another week, another train journey… And weddings in general.
Aaaah, another weekend brings with it another episode of “Katy on a Train”. It’s an exciting series which details the goings on aboard a FGW train to the West Country. Except nothing actually happens, and so I rant on about nothing in particular. Sorry.
This weekend, two of my friends from uni are taking that huge step in to matrimonial life by exchanging vows in front of family and friends. I say “huge step”, but really it’s just what would seem to the outsider as a formality. They’ve been cohabiting since they left university and are, for all intents and purposes, like an old married couple. The proposal wasn’t written across the sky either, which is a shame as I would have loved to have seen Ed up in a biplane doing loop-the-loops all in the name of love. (By the way, if anyone out there is planning to propose to me any time soon, it had better be IN STYLE and with HORSES.)
The wedding is taking place in Clifton, near Bristol, tomorrow (which explains the train journey) and luckily, they like me enough to want me there to witness it. A few months ago, I purchased some very pretty shoes which I had intended to wear at this wedding, but sadly I couldn’t find a dress to match, so I had to go ahead and buy a whole new pair of shoes to go with the dress I did find. Anyone who knows me well will know that I’m not one for buying a billion pairs of shoes, and that dresses are mainly kept for parties. It’s hard to get me out of my trousers . I expect that out of all the guests, I will the only one dressed in Primark. The dress I purchased doesn’t under any circumstances look like a Primark dress. I won’t ruin it for you, as I’m sure the pictures will be out soon enough, but it’s NICE. I’ve even gone to the effort of buying new accessories for my hair. Gosh, I’m so girly and I didn’t even know it.
Although I have a special person in my life, it all happened very much out of sync with the plans my friends were making and so will be attending this wedding ALONE. Well, I say that, I have friends there so I will have people to dance with. Not that dancing alone has ever been a problem. Just like Billy Idol, I will mostly be dancing with myself. The last wedding I attended solo was my sister’s back in April, and I was her maid of honour/chief bridesmaid, so I was more than occupied. Before that, I was either with someone or a child. I don’t get invited to many weddings, but that is starting to change as I get older. I don’t have a fear of being alone at such events, it’s never been an issue before with other events, as I just mingle and chatter on to anyone that will listen (or even people that aren’t listening, I don’t care). I think my main issue is the conversations when people assume that you’re single and start off a conversation already feeling sorry for you. Even if I was single, what would make you think that I’m not perfectly happy that way? And I’m not single, so why have you naturally assumed that, because I’m not glued to someone’s side, I’m single? Please, if you see me sat alone, I’d rather you assume that I’ve sat down for five minutes because my heels are killing me and I can’t possibly dance another minute without doing myself some damage.
One day, I hope to married. I’m not a religious person in any respect but I think it’s a nice way to be and, for selfish reasons, I want to change my surname without having to think up of one I can change it to via deed poll. That’s not the main reason for me wanting to get married, it’s not even the tenth reason, but it’s on the list. Deep down, under the hard skin and concrete blood, there’s a tiny bit of goo in my otherwise black heart that has room for a romantic side to develop. Romance isn’t dead, I just think people either can’t be bothered or aren’t really sure what it is anymore. The most romantic thing is something you have done that is specifically aimed at this one particular person. Buying roses and chocolates is lovely, and I will gladly accept them as a romantic gesture, but sadly it’s not top of the romance list. I’d rather you make something for me (aaah,mix tapes) or see something in shop that you know that I would love, regardless if anyone else would consider it romantic or sweet. For example, if I really liked peas (I really do not like peas, so this is hypothetical) the best thing you could do is take me pea shelling, or make me a pea soup to take to work for my lunch. If I liked Coldplay (again, hypothetical) and you didn’t, you’d take me anyway because that’s what romance is. And to expect nothing back in return except for a smile is what I would deem romantic. Don’t do what everyone else does. Do what you feel. Which is where marriage comes in. I wouldn’t get married because my friends are, or because everyone else says that it’s about time. I’d get married because I’m in love and I want to spend the rest of my life with someone.
Of course, I could just spend the rest of my life with someone without the expense of getting hitched, but I wouldn’t get to wear a pretty dress, and that KitchenAid isn’t going to buy itself…